ATTENTION. ATTENTION. FOR IMMEDIATE WIDESPREAD RELEASE:

ROD BLAGOJEVICH IS A MUPPET

rod blagojevich may not realize he is a muppet, but he clearly is

So I live in Chicago now, and one thing I had not fully anticipated before moving here is just how much I would constantly have to hear about Blagojevich, see his image, or listen to his voice. I failed to realize that I would be inserting myself, directly into the epicenter of Blagojevich central. I am in the belly of the Blagojevich beast.

I could never really bring myself to educate myself or care about this matter. Some random Governor of some random state I didn't care about getting embroiled in some sort of scandal. Whatever, don't need to really get into it. Besides, I don't even understand how a muppet even got such a prominent position of power.

That's right. Blagojevich is a muppet. Look at him. Look at his face. He is, without any doubt, a muppet. And a stupid muppet, too. His floppy stapled on hairdo and his vacant idiot face. He is a stupid muppet, that thinks he is human. And Blagojevich? What kind of name is that for a muppet?

Anyway, I can't wait until he either goes to jail or doesn't.