T E X A R R A K I S

WELCOME to the eBay auction that could change your life! What we have for you here today is pretty excellent. It is a Constant Temperature Anemometer! You probably know what that is. Kind of like how I know what it is too. So, now that we've established that we, top tiered intelligent people know exactly what a Constant Temperature Anemometer is, allow me to illuminate those who do not know what it is.

CONSTANT TEMPERATURE ANEMOMETER; let's break that down a bit.

CONSTANT = CHANGELESS
TEMPERATURE = THE DEGREE OF HOTNESS OR COLDNESS OF A BODY OR ENVIRONMENT
ANEMOMETER = A GAUGE FOR RECORDING THE SPEED AND DIRECTION OF WIND

There. there's your goddamned description, ok???

SO, as I said in the video, I got this from a prominent university in Boston, who were discarding it because they brought a brand new one. They assured me it works, however I am selling this product AS IS because it has not been tested by me.

SO LISTEN UP CONSTANT TEMPERATURE ANEMOMETER HOME ENTHUSIASTS, BID STRONG ON THIS BABY, I EXPECT A MASSIVE BIDDING WAR. ALSO, I SHOULD NOTE THIS THING IS A BEAST OF A MACHINE, AND ALTHOUGH I HATE HIGH SHIPPING RATES, I AM FORCED TO CHARGE A FLAT SHIPPING AND HANDLING RATE OF $40 (FORTY) DOLLARS. THANK YOU FOR UNDERSTANDING.

YOU SHOULD PROBABLY BID THOUSANDS OF DOLLARS ON THIS ITEM.
 

All proceeds from this auction will go to help fund the T E X A R R A K I S PROJECT.